Monday, November 30, 2009

Christian Side Hug

It looks like the Christians are engaging in, yet another, senseless battle.....a charge against the hug. Yes, you read right....according to the video below, it is now sinful to commence with "full-frontal hugging". Apparently churches are encouraging their flocks to enact the "side-hug" rule to prevent participants from bumping uglies. Here's a little more info from Stuff Christians Like...

"In the side hug there’s no risk of two crotches touching. Instead of face to face, you go side to side, putting your arm around the person and your hip against their’s. Still having a hard time mastering it? Pretend you’re taking a photo and you’re both looking at the camera together. The side hug, or A frame as it is also called, is safe for the whole family, friendly and above all holy."

And now we present the video featuring a couple of white pastors throwing "gang signs" and rapping for the lord.

13 comments:

Dale said...

What about the classic "man hug?"
A handshake, clasped hands to the chests, free arm around the other manly mans back.
Backslapping/patting is encouraged, but optional.
The clasped hands at chest level prevent any "junk to junk" contact, so nobody will run the risk of "catching the ghey."
Would that be OK?

Anonymous said...

Those same uptight people have bondage and S&M equipment at home...
why cant christians just keep their noses out other peoples business?
I know quite a few woman that like to have their "Junk bumped"...that's why they hug you harder.;)

Anonymous said...

Im sticking with the grinding hug with the bun grab in the back. Amen.

Anonymous said...

must not grab some side boob when doing the side hug

Anonymous said...

have you read the website? it's a joke, think you should do better research

Anonymous said...

web site is a joke. video is not

Anonymous said...

The video is a joke too. You do realize that not all christians are super uptight assholes and some can actually poke fun at themselves? Well, not catholics but a lot of others are allowed to.

Anonymous said...

It's a gateway hug. It all started with a simple side hug here and there, next thing I know I'm hugging the shit out of random people. Lord help me!

Anonymous said...

you really should check out that website, they just raised 60,000 to build two schools in Vietnam, bring on the side hugs

Anonymous said...

Friend of ours has a son thats in First Baptist daycare...the parents told the teacher that they dont want "That 5-Year old" hugging our kid...The lil one loves his classmates...WTF?

Anonymous said...

This blog is from the devil! I'm going to confession and communion next Sunday for sure. Meanwhile I'll pray 3 rosaries and sprinkle myself with holy water. Sinful, just sinful! Any altar boys available to help me out?

Anonymous said...

Pick me! Pick me!

Anonymous said...

Is this a Holy day of Consumption?